December142024

gingersnapwolves:

So today I want to talk about puberty blockers for transgender kids, because despite being cisgender, this is a subject I’m actually well-versed in. Specifically, I want to talk about how far backwards things have gone.

This story starts almost 20 years ago, and it’s kind of long, but I think it’s important to give you the full history. At the time, I was working as an administrative assistant for a pediatric endocrinologist in a red state. Not a deep deep red state like Alabama, we had a little bit of a purple trend, but still very much red. (I don’t want to say the state at the risk of doxxing myself.) And I took a phone call from a woman who said, “My son is transgender. Does your doctor do hormone therapy?”

I said, “Good question! Let me find out.”

I went into the back and found the doctor playing Solitaire on his computer and said, “Do you do hormone therapy for transgender kids?” It had literally never come up before. He had opened his practice there in the early 2000s. This was roughly 2006, and the first time someone asked. Without looking up from his game of Solitaire, the doctor said, “I’ve never done it before, but I know how it works, so sure.”

I got back on the phone and told the mom, who was overjoyed, and scheduled an appointment for her son. He was the first transgender child we treated with puberty blockers. But not, by far, the first child we treated with puberty blockers, period. Because puberty blockers are used very commonly for children with precocious puberty (early-onset puberty). I would say about twenty percent of the kids our doctor treated were for precocious puberty and were on puberty blockers. They have been well studied and are widely used, safe, and effective.

Well. It turned out, the doctor I worked for was the only doctor in the state who was willing to do this. And word spread pretty fast in the tight-knit community of ‘parents of transgender children in a red state’. We started seeing more kids. A better drug came out. We saw some kids who were at the age where they were past puberty, and prescribed them estrogen or testosterone. Our doctor became, I’m fairly sure, a small folk hero to this community. 

Insurance coverage was a struggle. I remember copying articles and pages out of the Endocrine Society Manual to submit with prior authorization requests for the medications. Insurance coverage was a struggle for a lot of what we did, though. Growth hormone for kids with severe idiopathic short stature. Insulin pumps, which weren’t as common at the time, and then continuous glucose monitoring, when that came out. Insurance struggles were just part and parcel of the job.

I remember vividly when CVS Caremark, a pharmaceutical management company, changed their criteria and included gender dysphoria as a covered diagnosis for puberty blockers. I thought they had put the option on the questionnaire to trigger an automatic denial. But no - it triggered an approval. Medicaid started to cover it. I got so good at getting approvals with my by then tidy packet of articles and documentation that I actually had people in other states calling me to see what I was submitting (the pharmaceutical rep gave them my number because they wanted more people on their drug, which, shady, but sure. He did ask me if it was okay first).

And here’s the key point of this story:

At no point, during any of this, did it ever even occur to any of us that we might have to worry about whether or not what we were doing was legal.

It just never even came up. It was the medically recommended treatment so we did it. And seeing what’s happening in the UK and certain states in America is both terrifying and genuinely shocking to me, as someone who did this for almost fifteen years, without ever even wondering about the legality of it.

The doctor retired some years ago, at which point there were two other doctors in the state who were willing to prescribe the medications for transgender kids. I truly think that he would still be working if nobody else had been willing to take those kids on as patients. He was, by the way, a white cisgender heterosexual Boomer. I remember when he was introduced to the concept of ‘genderfluid’ because one of our patients on HRT wanted to go off. He said ‘that’s so interesting!’ and immediately went to Google to learn more about it. 

I watched these kids transform. I saw them come into the office the first time, sometimes anxious and uncertain, sometimes sullen and angry. I saw them come in the subsequent times, once they were on hormone therapy, how they gradually became happy and confident in themselves. I saw the smiles on their faces when I gave them a gender marker letter for the DMV. I heard them cheer when I called to tell them I’d gotten HRT approved by insurance and we were calling in a prescription. It was honestly amazing and I will always consider the work I did in that red state with those kids to be something I am incredibly proud of. I was honored to be a part of it.

When I see all this transgender backlash, it’s horrifying, because it was well on the way to become standard and accepted treatment. Insurances started to cover it. Other doctors were learning to prescribe it. And now … it’s fucking illegal? Like what the actual fuck. We have gone so far backwards that it makes me want to cry. I don’t know how to stop this slide. But I wrote this so people would understand exactly how steep the slide is.

(via solsticelosthermind)

November122024

sturionic:

elwingflight:

sixth-light:

sturionic:

Activism is not cold-calling.

Activism is not cold-calling, and this is critically important to understand.

I’m seeing a lot of posts on here about ‘building bridges’ and 'finding community,’ and then (extremely valid) response posts saying “BUT HOW??” And I’m going to explain something that can be very counter-intuitive: there is strategy involved in community.

As a longtime volunteer labour organizer, I’ve taken and taught many trainings on the strategy of talking. Something that surprises a lot of people is the very first thing you do in a union campaign. You sit down with your organizing committee, take out pen and paper, and literally map it out. You draw a physical map of the workplace: where are the entrances, exits, break rooms, supervisor offices. Essentially, ‘where is it safe to have a union conversation.’ Then you draw another physical chart of your coworkers. You sort out who is union-friendly, openly hostile to unions, or somewhere in the middle, and then you plan out very deliberately and carefully who talks to whom and in what order.

Consider: If Vocally Leftist Jane walks up to Conservative David and says “hey what do you think about unions,” David is going to shut down immediately. He’s not inclined to listen to Jane. But if Jane talks to Moderate Jason and brings him into the fold, then Jason is a far more effective strategic choice to talk to David, and David may actually hear him out without an instant reaction.

IMPORTANT CAVEAT: If Conservative David turns out to be Alt-Right David, and could be dangerous to follow organizers, we write him off. We are not trying to reach Alt-Right David. We are trying to reach Conservative David, who may actually be persuaded to find solidarity with other employees as fellow workers. Jason is a safe scout to find out which one he is. It does no one any good if Leftist Jane (or even Moderate Jane who is a visible minority) talks to Alt-Right David and puts herself on his radar. Not only has she done nothing to convince Alt-Right David to join a union - she’s probably actively turned him against the idea - but now she’s also in danger and the entire campaign is at risk. NOBODY WANTS THIS. Jane was NOT a hero for doing this. The organizing committee was foolish and enacted a terrible strategy to everyone’s detriment.

Where you can make a difference is with people who will listen to you. You having a conversation with your well-meaning but clueless Centrist Democrat Auntie, and maybe gently helping her understand some things the media has been glossing over, is way more strategically useful than you marching up to MAGA Neighbour You’ve Met Once and trying to “build community” or “understand” them. They don’t care. They’re impervious, dangerous, and cruel. But maybe your beloved auntie will think about what you said, and then talk to her friend Anna who IDs as “fiscally conservative” but didn’t vote because she can’t bring herself to get on board with Trump. Then perhaps Anna talks to her brother Nic who has MAGA leanings but isn’t all the way there yet. Proto-MAGA Nic would not have listened to you, nor would he have listened to Centrist Democrat Auntie, but he might absorb some of what his sister is saying.

This is not a cop-out or an echo chamber. This is you spending your time and energy strategically and safely. You are not a useful activist to anyone if you’re dead. Anyone who is telling you to hurl yourself directly at MAGA assholes like cannon fodder has no understanding of the strategy behind community building, and you should feel comfortable writing them off.

Last point: If you are tired, emotionally devastated, and/or in danger: take a break. This post is for people who would feel better jumping into action, not for people who are too overwhelmed to even think about it right now. You are worth so much even if you’re not actively Doing Activism, and your rest is worth more than “a break period so you can recharge and Do More Activism.” We all deserve the individual dignity of being worthy of comfort, rest & safety just on the basis of being human, outside of whatever we’re doing for others’ benefit. To deny ourselves that dignity is to devalue ourselves, and that’s the absolute last thing any of us should be doing right now.

Oh hey this is the post I was going to write as a follow-up and now I don’t have to. Anyway, see everything above for why blaming the way women respond to men on the internet who they have no existing relationship with for the rise of alt-right misogyny is extremely beside the point. Effective activism leverages existing relationships - and requires people who are committed to doing activism in the first place.

This kind of planning is in fact what half of union organizing is. Its both genuine (you really need to actually care about the people you’re talking to!) and strategic (what matters to this person? How will they be able to accept this message?)

Also: you’re not trying to convince someone to agree with you perfectly. I’m trying to convince a hesitant coworker to show up on the first day of a potential strike and see how it goes. Or, as a different example, I’m not trying to convince my grandmother to call herself antizionist. I’m trying to convince her that she should use her influence in her synagogue community to advocate for an immediate ceasefire. In both cases, its finding the right ask for who I’m talking to- something that is both reasonable and will make a difference.

A million times yes to both of these additions, which complement @ariaste’s tags:

image

Activism is a balance of strategy & humanity. @elwingflight is correct that there is LOTS of planning involved in union organizing. There’s literally detailed conversational scripts for talking to your coworkers about unionizing, and they’re effective. We can and should be using script & strategy. The alt-right is doing it, also very effectively, and for unfathomably evil purposes. We need to be fighting back in ways that work.

And then @sixth-light’s extremely powerful & succinct way of putting it: “Effective activism leverages existing relationships.” Because fundamentally we are all people, and human beings can only take so much of being yelled at by strangers on twitter who see us as subhuman (“their side”) or cannon fodder (“our side.”)

I know the “you can’t pour from an empty cup” saying goes around all the time relating to activism, but this doesn’t just mean rest time - it also means making sure the time & energy you are using is used well, and that you’re allowing yourself to see and appreciate the results, even if having a conversation with your grandma or hesitant coworker isn’t overthrowing the regime in one go. You need to learn to set and achieve 'smaller’ goals, because those are the building blocks, and because anchoring yourself to those points of connection will help you keep moving forward.

(via dsudis)

12PM
bogleech:
“kittydorkling:
“jenroses:
“ shinnegamitensei:
“ this site has one setting
”
I’m laughing, but there’s a super useful corollary, which my husband calls “the Red Balloon.” He was a defense lawyer and had a fair number of drug addicts come...

bogleech:

kittydorkling:

jenroses:

shinnegamitensei:

image

this site has one setting

I’m laughing, but there’s a super useful corollary, which my husband calls “the Red Balloon.” He was a defense lawyer and had a fair number of drug addicts come through, and there is a thing where if you’re like, on your first offense, they’ll do a thing where you can go to treatment and if you complete it they’ll take the conviction off your record. 

And he would tell his clients, “Look, everyone’s going to tell you not to do drugs. They’re going to say it over and over again. And it’s like, if people tell you not to think of a white elephant, you’re going to think of a white elephant. But the trick to not thinking about a white elephant is to think of a red balloon. So you need to find your red balloon. For some people it’s yoga. For others it’s woodworking. For some people it’s scrapbooking or gardening or any of a long list of things to do. They focus on that, it’s a lot easier to succeed in ignoring the white elephant.”

So yeah, “watch yourself” is one thing… but the better idea is to watch something else. (Even if it’s fanfic about werewolves fucking.)


It’s a form of productive dissociation, and is super, super helpful.

It’s easy for me to get bogged down in how much pain I’m in… but some of the most painful periods of my life have also been the most productive, writing-wise, because writing is one of my red balloons. 

There is a phrase I use A LOT in my parenting and my son gets very sick of it, but it’s true:

The thing you practise is the thing you get good at.

You may not intentionally be practicing “being grumpy” but if you don’t put effort into practicing “not being grumpy” then I’m afraid that’s what you’re doing. It’s hard! It’s really hard! Sometimes, for some things, it’s pretty much impossible and that sucks!

But being carefully aware that you are going to get good at the things you do most of is a good way to be more careful of what those things are. If that makes sense.

You gotta appreciate sometimes how tumblr works in such a way that everyone who wants to reblog this interesting or useful psychological advice is also forced to reblog the thing about werewolf fucking

(via turtlesandfrogs)

November112024

punkitt-is-here:

sanitymakesposts:

There’s not too much point in talking about the election anymore, but I think some people are misconstruing the results. 21% of the American population voted for trump. He won the popular vote with polls only recording a 43.7% approval rating, and he has never held an approval rating over 50%, something that Biden and (arguably) Harris have. He lost millions of votes from 2020 to 2024, it’s just that Harris lost millions more.

All this is to say that there is not some ‘silent majority’ of trump supporters in America. While some people will definitely be emboldened in their rhetoric and action by the results of the election, Trump was a deeply unpopular president, and is shaping up to be one again. He will enact unpopular policies that are against the will of the average American, but that doesn’t mean every American is out to get you. Engage with your local community, check in on loved ones, and maybe even take a look at local political offices in the coming few years. If you dislike the two party system, volunteer or donate to a third party. It’s altogether likely we see another 2022 situation, resentment grows further against the Republican Party, and the midterms offer a lot of opportunity to alternatives, at every level of government.

It may all feel like the end, but it’s not. We’ve been through it before, and no matter what we do, hate and ignorance will bleed through the cracks in society again in the future. It’s going to get better, but that’s easier to say if we make it better.

image

(via reveriereversed)

12PM
fuck-it-i-wont-respond:
“teaboot:
“loekvugs:
“I had this idea for a looping animation in which a single dot has a pretty long loop, but the animation as a whole is much shorter. Because of the repetition this animation is only 1 second long!
”
THIS...

fuck-it-i-wont-respond:

teaboot:

loekvugs:

I had this idea for a looping animation in which a single dot has a pretty long loop, but the animation as a whole is much shorter. Because of the repetition this animation is only 1 second long!

THIS GIF IS ONE SECOND LONG

image

I added a little shadow thing

(via icarus-suraki)

November82024

Anonymous asked:

Trump 2016 was nothing compared to what's coming and you know it.

ms-demeanor:

No I don’t, and you don’t either.

One of the problems that I have with electoralism is that every election is the most important election of our lives. Every election is the last one to save democracy. Every election is the only way that we can protect the marginalized otherwise so you have to vote blue no matter who or you’re going to be killed in the streets by the red team.

This is propaganda to get people to vote, but what it also does is reinforce the idea that the only people who can save you are the ones on the ballot.

There are people all over the world living under fascist regimes, living in war zones, living in dictatorships, who are supporting one another. There are trans communities under Modi and queers in Russia and people who provide underground reproductive healthcare in Iran and people who provide medical care to their neighbors in tents in Gaza.

What you are doing is American exceptionalism in a liberal hat. This is NOT the end of the fucking world. This is NOT the worst disaster you will ever face. This is NOT a reason to give up or to stop caring or to stop working or to lay down and die.

Is this a good thing that has happened? No. But bad things happen all the time and we keep going.

If you must wallow, then wallow, but I’ve got shit to do just like I did last week.

November72024

thebibliosphere:

It’s OK if you’re not OK right now. I’m certainly not. Mothman isn’t. We’re devastated. There’s a hollow crater in my chest where my heart ought to be. I’m sick with worry. But I can’t let it consume me. So we’re going to allow ourselves to grieve and then find actionable ways to counter what lies ahead.

That will look different for everyone, but one thing that will be universally required in the days and years ahead is compassion and an unshakable commitment to kindness.

We will help each other through this. We will find ways to help other people. We will protect the people we love and even those we don’t to the best of our abilities. Because that’s the only option we have.

We will do it angry, we will do it sad, we will do it terrified. But we will do it.

Please be gentle with yourself. Please don’t do anything to harm yourself. The world needs your light. It needs your anger and your hope. It needs you.

(via eclectic-like-furniture)

12PM

unseenbox:

So, I guess as a middle range millennial, I now get to tell all you young queer kids that what you are feeling right now is exactly how it felt in 2004 when we re-elected George Bush, and not only that but many states put in bans against gay/same sex marriage at the time.

This is probably not comforting, but it is true, and it helps me when I feel hopeless: For every revolution there is a counter revolution, for every step forward there is a step back, that things may not be good forever but they will not be bad, either. That we clawed our way to get where we are and we can claw our way forward from here, too. Talk to your queer elders, the ones who have been here before and will be here again and who threw bricks at Stonewall.

When I was a child, if you got AIDS it was a death sentence. Now it isn’t. Now you live on.

So I’ll quote angels in america: You are fabulous creatures, each and every one. And I bless you: More Life. The Great Work Begins.

(via everystarstorm)

November42024

renareyart:

image

Happy potatoes and molasses season everyone!

(via mothric)

12PM

notbecauseofvictories:

notbecauseofvictories:

I’m going to the conservatory and the zoo tomorrow; treating myself like a blue-haired senior who needs to be bused from her retirement home to on weekends for cultural enrichment.

I made this post two years ago, and nothing has so meaningfully improved my life as “treat yourself like a senior citizen and schedule some enrichment.” I have an honest-to-god enrichment calendar now. It exists specifically as a place to put all the stuff that I might want to do on a random evening or weekend. And I read local papers a lot more, searching for things to do, smaller events that are more up my alley or offbeat street fests that I wouldn’t know about otherwise. (Side benefit—I know a lot more about local reporting too.) It doesn’t matter that I put plenty of events on the enrichment calendar that—because it’s on a Wednesday, because I’m tired, because the planets are in the wrong position—I don’t go to! The point is not create an unbending obligation that will haunt me to my grave; the point is to pay more attention to the world, and leave my apartment to join it sometimes.

(via pavlovs-pigeon)

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